Artifice and Ash

Call me Ishmael

No? Alright, we'll think of something else later.

I will be quick as things just got entertaining and I’d like to focus more on them.

Terry left. Turns out, Terry left to go have a shootout with the cops and put three of them in the hospital. His face, his car, his everything that could identify him is plastered all over the news and no one is even remotely on his side(more on that).

Alex and Z are vampires now. Alex ordered and escort for them to get their noms on, but apparently Alex fucked up, so in I step to play Super Gross-out with their security guy until he doesn’t want to go in the room to check on the girl Alex is with. She came out looking like Alex just played boogeyman with her butthole and they leave without question.

The info showed up and Alex and Z pretty much have this bank job planned out.

Z’s uncle called and told him a lot of things that he then told to us. Apparently, total spooks from a mysterious branch of the government are on our tracks. They don’t seem to care about much beyond the writing that was on the tablet and what it has to do with us.

Oh, the tablet! It started glowing and vibrating. We put it out on the back lawn and I, recall something about burned linen, dropped a piece of cloth on it. Yep, the tablet teleported the hell away, leaving its writings burned into the cloth.

Slendy is so amazingly catty and sarcastic, and I think he knows that that’s one of my turn-ons. A weird turn-on, yes, but still… Too bad he’s a ghost.

Oh shit! I have super powers! It’s awesome! Like, I can sit down for a minute and focus, and it lets me set up an area that makes people feel what I want them to feel. At first, I could just tell what they were feeling, but Slendy gave me some insight on it, and now I’m better at it. Alex didn’t notice ‘cause I just used his emotions, but Z said it worked! Slendy also says I can use the same power to affect any technology in a building. I can also do other things, but I haven’t had much time to figure it all out yet. Slendy only brought the whole thing up ‘cause he was listening to Z talk to Alex about the bank job. We’re totally gonna get so much money!

I’m so jazzed this shit is just like being in a comic book! Seriously, good or bad, I can’t wait to see what happens next!

Oh, on a sad note, it seems like the group is has reached a consensus that no one gives a fuck about Terry. I felt bad that I didn’t argue that much. Not because I actually felt bad, but because I knew I should and I didn’t. He’s my friend, but… I don’t know… Everything that’s going on just seems too… Real. Like, this is all happening how it’s meant to happen. I mean, right about the time that all four of us were having a calm, rational discussion about us being two vampires, a were-cat(yeah, Abby’s a were-cat. Were-leopard. Were-creature, dammit.) and a zombie, it hit me.

Everything is going to be okay.

Well, except for things that make Slender Man get all grim on me. I mean, really. We wonder between us the significance of what was written on the tablet, and Slendy immediately gets all serious and tells me he knows a guy. I’ll be honest, him being serious makes me a little nervous.

Well, Z and I headed out to talk to Slender Man’s guy-he-knows, but before we left, Z told Alex and Abby to stake out the guys we’re gonna frame for the bank job (squee! just like a movie!). I got to ride on a motorcycle with Z. Yaknow, as much as I inwardly mock Abby for going for the bad-boy-cop thing and sleeping with him, I have to admit, I’m kinda jelly. It took a fair deal of self control to keep my junk in check. BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THAT!

Turned out Slendy’s friend was in a burned-down bar. Like, a burned-down-a-long-time-ago bar. Lot of graffiti and other such evidence of vagrant traffic, but deserted at the time of our arrival. Slends told me to open the door, and I went to, but he stopped me and told me to open the door the same way I activate my superpower. A little confused, I focus on opening the door the same way I’d focused on setting up my emotional field(boneyard, Slender Man called it), and lo and behold, the door opens from the hinge side into a super-creepy cave. I tried to get Z to hold my hand using the “We may get separated” argument. He didn’t buy it. Bastard.

Blah, blah, blah, creepy cave system comparable to the vision of hell in Doom 3, and we get to a plaque with the words “Nothing Leaves” written on it. Slendy tells me to ask for Prof. UAdghauidhfj, if memory serves(okay, I forgot the name. Eat me.), and a guy made of spiders showed up and tried to trade Z for the Prof. Slender Man gets grim again and tells me to “MAKE him tell” me. Jesus, it’s a guy made of spiders! How do I make him do shit? Well, I remembered my emotion superpowers and used them to make Spidies more open to… Aggressive Suggestions. Zacharia is good at Aggressive Suggestions. I don’t know if it would have worked without Super Me, but I’m going to say it wouldn’t have.

So there. To recap: Abby hates Hakuna Matata and her tits got more delicious, Alex is a fantastic broker but a terrible whore-eater, Z is smexy from the back of a motorcycle, I can enter and exit hell at will, Terry is a cop-killer, and the tablet that Terry had casts its own ritual that binds werewolves in human form. I can honestly say, I’m very interested in what comes next!

Oh, and if I don’t get laid soon, I’m gonna start having wet dreams, and I only have so many pants with me.



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